Dropped out of university
David dropped out of university when he was 20 and spent 10 years doing other work. Then he got another place on a university course and wanted to be sure not to drop out again. So he came to see me to get study skills help. What worried me was how much he talked of making a good impression on his new course, resolving to give his work his ‘one hundred per cent commitment’ and to hand in every homework assignment ‘on time every time’. He planned to spend all spare time working and had already stopped seeing friends. This attitude was likely to lead to a breakdown especially because as a mature student David felt he had so much to prove. David reflected on his experience of having dropped out of university first time round. He became less hard on himself for his failure, as he observed in our sessions the connection between his learning problems and his parents’ divorce and alcoholism. He got over some traumatic experiences which he had never resolved before: with EFT his worst memories stopped haunting him.
All these changes – study skills help, discussions about perfectionism and EFT – enabled David to adopt a different attitude to his life and work. He stopped craving perfection. He started to thrive at university and made friends even among the ‘elite’, the clever students who he’d always envied. He stopped worrying about his performance, and in this relaxed way, scored top grades in his second year.